The Dog Days Of Michael VickPosted by admin - 12/07/10 at 09:07 am
More fun on the Michael Vick front, following the shooting at his own birthday party a few weeks ago, his probation won’t allow him to leave the state. That means he couldn’t make his own golf tournament in Atlanta, or a youth football camp he’d already been paid to attend.
To begin with, “The Michael Vick Birthday Party Shooting” is an awesome name for a scandal. It sounds like something the Onion would make up. It’s my favorite scandal, at least until we see the headline “Tony Danza Stabs Three During Golden Corral Lunch Buffet.”
I love the Vick story, simply because I’m a fan of things I’ve never seen happen before. Vick has turned his life into such a train wreck/grease fire/clown autopsy, it’s hard to look away.
Yeah. To start with, what the Hell kind of parents send their kid to a football camp because Michael Vick is going to be there? The kind that CPS should be investigating, that’s the kind.
“Well we wanted little Timmy to learn how to run a pro-style offense, and also how to professionally manage a dogfighting ring large enough to have it’s own concession stands. We want him prepared for the future.”
Here’s my favorite quote, the guy who runs the camp was obviously upset that after he agreed to pay Vick $4000, he didn’t show up.
“I’m upset because our camp is built on integrity and character and that’s what we teach to our kids.”
I’m not sure exactly how either of those words apply to Vick, unless “Integrity” is the name of one of the banks suing him for defaulted loans, and “character” is used as a general description for felons who aren’t even smart enough to get away with marijuana.
Seriously, if you pay money to send your kid to a football camp to meet Michael Vick for a character-building exercise, it better damn well involve you taking your kid aside and saying “See Billy? Just being good at what you do is not enough. If you’re an idiot, it will catch up with you eventually, and then you’ll go from the Pro Bowl to The Last Boy Scout.”
— Reid Kerr believes in second chances. Third and fourth? Not so much.