TV Or Not TV

Posted by admin - 16/08/11 at 07:08 am

Looking around my house for extras and things to cut back on, I have settled on my cable/satellite bill as a first option.

Back history, I have always been a cable guy. Since the late 70s when it became available to us in Bonham, Texas, I have always had the full run of channels on my television. I lived in one of the first households to get ESPN, and I proudly remember sitting with my dad watching a North Dakota High School All-Star football game. I was hooked from an early age, when cable meant little more than getting to watch Georgia Championship Wrestling.

Two years ago, I signed on with DirectTV. Actually, what happened was I went to the AT&T store to buy a phone, and then got trapped inside during an epic rainstorm. While I was there, I fell prey to the dreaded “Bundling Sales Pitch,” where I agreed to sign up for a phone, cell phone, internet, satellite, DVR, Bluray, e-reader, food processor, shredding service, and walkie-talkies.

And I'll miss you most of all, Scarecrow.

So I got DirectTV, primarily for the free NFL Sunday Ticket. In the first year, it was free, and honestly, it was awesome. Second year, it goes from free back to its regular price of fifty thousand dollars. However, I learned if you call them and say you want to cancel, they’ll start marking down the price to about thirty bucks a month.

This year, my contract with DirectTV is up and I’ve noticed they’re advertising “Free NFL Sunday Ticket” again. However, it’s not for suckers people who’ve already signed up. Even if you offer to take their two year offer again, this sweet deal is not for you, Chester. Therefore when I called in to tell them about canceling and they started marking the price down, I was disappointed when they never got to “Free.”

So no NFL package this year. However, HBO and Showtime each have exactly 1.5 shows on them I like to watch, so I need those too. Getting the regular channels I want from DirectTV will run me $120.

I called my cable company, and spent forty-seven minutes on the phone. Literally. Nearly an hour of my life gone to talk to a representative who didn’t seem to have any idea what was going on. She told me she could bundle my cable service ($100) and my internet ($40) together for just $170. I asked her if I dropped the internet, if they could double the price and come kick my dog. She didn’t get it.

Making my television quandry even more complicated is our Roku box, which allows us to watch Netflix and Hulu for about eight bucks each. The Roku is great, but not all-encompassing. You can’t watch some brand-new shows on it, and no live sports. So basically, I’m left with this.

Great, eh? Looks like I could watch everything I ever wanted for about fifty bucks…except for one thing or another. No matter what I choose, chances are I’ll leave something out. True Blood, NFL, Dexter, they’ve arranged it all to where unless you buy everything, something gets left out.

Cable and satellite both trumpet their hundreds of channels. Just for grins, I went through my DVR and wrote down how many shows I record regularly and what channel they are on. Care to make a guess?

Thirteen channels.

Yep. I’m not watching anything on TVGuide Channel, Logo, or the Lifetime Tori Spelling Movies Network. Likewise I do not need the Nazi Channel, Redneck TV, or the Heavily Censored Horror Movie Network.

Everything I watch currently I can get on less than fifteen cable networks. Does anyone offer a package of those fifteen networks?

Not on your life. I’ll still be paying a wad of bills every month to watch fifteen channels. Meanwhile, they could be showing slides of my baby pictures on two hundred other channels, and I’d never notice.

— Reid Kerr thinks there should be a channel that just shows what contestants on old game shows did with their winnings.

4 Responses to “TV Or Not TV”

  1. Joel Heflin says:
    August 16th, 2011 at 4:13 pm

    I have the same exact problem. I would love to drop 99% of my channels. If you find a solution please let me know!

  2. admin says:
    August 16th, 2011 at 5:53 pm

    I’m running the numbers right now. It’s hard to get a good deal without leaving out one of your “can’t miss” shows.

  3. Sherry Parrish says:
    August 16th, 2011 at 5:55 pm

    I’m going thru this exact senario. Only I watch even less than 13…Called cable to bundle and save…no way Jose…no available since I’m a good, pay on time every month, existing customer! What to do? Love your blogs! Way funny!

  4. drake lyrics says:
    August 22nd, 2011 at 11:39 am

    drake song lyrics…

    Reid About It » Blog Archive » TV Or Not TV…

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