One At A Time

Posted by admin - 08/09/11 at 06:09 am

I like people. I really do. Individually, I find people fascinating. Their individual looniness and quirks give me hope.

However, groups of people lead me to be in favor of forced euthanasia with a rusty meat hook.

I hate groups of people. Yeah, if you’ve got more than one person you agree with, chances are I ignore you. Whatever you believe, that’s fine. However, if you need the backing of other people to be confident in your opinions, rethink them.

That’s why I love insane people, especially conspiracy theorists. Any man who can stand in front of me and tell me that Johnny Cash was murdered by the Illuminati, as it was written in the black helicopters portion of Revelations and spelled out on the want ads page of the Wabash County Daily Shopper, that guy has inner confidence that I admire. Also because usually they’re wearing footy pajamas and a tinfoil hat, and they smell like rancid ass, but they don’t care. They’re interested in the truth.

Anyway, we see it all the time our need for support and the way it changes us. There’s somebody in your life right now that you like, as long as he’s the only guy you have to talk to. We’ve all said it.

“I like Robbie, but when he gets around Bill, he’s really a dirtbag.”

“Kathy’s a nice girl, but I swear when she’s with Erma, they always wind up drunk down at the docks picking up sailors.”

“Raphael is okay, but whenever Alphonse shows up, he winds up face down in my front yard dressed like a school girl.

We seem to have a pathological need to be a part of something larger than ourselves for validation. Our feelings aren’t enough, we have to join the herd. We have to declare ourselves Republicans, or Methodists, or Cubs fans, or People Who Slept With Pamela Anderson, or whatever.

I reject that notion. I don’t need anyone else to agree with me to feel good about my choices. Of course, by the very nature of my belief, I can’t let you agree with me. That’ll take me right down the road to Jonestown.

— Reid Kerr likes himself, but not when he’s around other people.



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