Down For The Sleigh Ride

Posted by admin - 07/12/11 at 05:12 am

At great personal expense and physical danger, I’ve finished most of my Christmas shopping. Because of work and other things, Christmas with my family will be taking place this weekend. There’s no better way to ramp up the blind holiday panic than by setting an early deadline, so today, we spent about nineteen hours and eleven thousand dollars to get everything done.

Anyway, now we’re all done. We can relax, which is good because my legs feel like I’ve been pulling a sleigh for eight hours. Three of the last places I stopped to shop were Wal-Mart, Dollar Tree, and Big Lots. By the time I got home, my hands were so dirty I washed them before I went to the bathroom.

Anyway, we capped off the evening sitting resting our tired feet and honoring the tradition of watching Christmas Vacation. Still funny, every year. It’s reached Rocky Horror Picture Show status around here, with every funny line recited in stereo.

Idle question, how do you feel about giving lottery tickets as Christmas gifts? In one way, you might be giving somebody something really nice, but chances are, you’re just giving them garbage.

To me, it says “Here. I’ve gone on the assumption that since I was only planning on spending a dollar on you, you wouldn’t mind gambling with it.”

Why not just give somebody betting slips? “Here, Aunt Edith. I’ve put ten bucks on the Broncos to cover in your name. Good luck with Tim Tebow.”

— Reid Kerr would probably rather just have the dollar.

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