Shatter-gories

Posted by admin - 31/05/12 at 11:05 am

The bane of my existence.

My least favorite party game? Scattergories.

I consider myself a fairly intelligent guy. I’m not a simpleton, at least, but that’s the way Scattergories makes me feel.

If you’ve never played, each of the players has a card with a list of things on it.  Breeds of dogs, flowers, TV shows, etc. Someone rolls a die to come up with a letter, and everyone has to brainstorm something that starts with that letter for each of the things.

Sounds simple, right? It should be, but while I can remember all sorts of trivial details about other things, thinking about big broad concepts just causes my mind to shut off.

“Uh…things in the room, starts with T…uh…oh, man…ahhhhh…tribbles? No, no. Tap…estries? Tapestries? No, this place isn’t a museum. Ah…grrr…tip…ple…tee-toes? That’s not a word! Arrrgggh!”

Ding!

What did you get, Reid?

Nothing.

What did you get, semi-retarded redneck cousin who can’t even legally drive?

Table!

Yeah, thanks for all that, Scattergories. I appreciate you pointing out to me how obliviously stupid I can be. That’s exactly what I want at a party. It’s like if “Life” had a space that said “Fail to satisfy your woman, go three spaces back.”

— Reid Kerr would prefer to do something interactive, like Bumfights.

 

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