There’s Something About Figgy

Posted by admin - 18/12/12 at 05:12 am

You know which Christmas carol really bothers me? “We Wish You A Merry Christmas”. Think of it, it’s the rudest, pushiest carol ever. Examine the second verse.

Now bring us some figgy pudding
Now bring us some figgy pudding
Now bring us some figgy pudding

Screw you, random carolers. Who are you to be making dietary demands of me? And to then threaten me, as heard in the third verse?

We won’t go until we get some
We won’t go until we get some
We won’t go until we get some

Rather insistent, of course, not to mention cloying and needy. But the next line really ticks me off.

So bring it right here!

Get your lazy ass off the couch, and get thine own figgy pudding. Don’t order me around, and then expect me to deliver. Don’t make me break this yule log off and wear you out with it.

— Reid Kerr doesn’t even know what the Hell “sugarplums” look like.

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