Reid’s Writing TipsPosted by admin - 02/07/15 at 03:07 pm
While hanging out on Twitter today (at @ReidAboutIt, of course), I saw some other writer handing out some #WritingTips. I felt like the world should have the benefit of my vast lack of knowledge, and since my jeans were in the wash and I had time, I thought I’d hammer out a few of my rules for newbies.
These are 100% guaranteed to work, although please remember that guarantee is not legally backed up in any way, shape, or form.
- Remember, backstory and context are important to establish for characters, so always start your book with a murder spree at a family reunion.
- Try not to write things that make people wonder what’s on TV.
- If you use social media solely to harass people to buy your book, you risk shunning, plus getting punched in the taint.
- Non-paying gigs can really help you with exposure, which is what you’ll die of when you’re broke and living under a bridge.
- If your intro sucks, feel free to use “I was dreaming when I wrote this, forgive me if it goes astray.”
- Literary agents generally prefer to find their own clients. But not in their backyards, holding a hatchet.
- Getting a high Google ranking is important for sales, so play it safe and name your book’s romantic interest “Google.”
- Sometimes it helps to get away from your work while editing, so don’t be afraid to bury it in the back yard for a few days while you go get drunk.
- If you’re running short on a word count, drop a few dozen “very’s” in there. Editors very love that stuff.
- You can learn a lot from negative reviews of your work, including which pills you can mix with alcohol and still live.
- Asking social media followers to retweet things for you often is like asking them to pick you up at the airport. Every day.
— Reid Kerr would like to remind you his comedy novel, “The Great Texas Trailer Park Escape” is available for the low low price of $2.99 at Amazon and Barnes and Noble.com.